One year in.

We got here early July 2017. It is now a year later. You can try and prepare yourself to live in another country- read up on the culture, do all the research. But, until you are there and completely immersed, you really have no idea how your daily life is going to be. Surprisingly, the big things are easy to deal with, and it’s the little things that you feel like will break you.

We have discovered so many wonderful things about living in Copenhagen. You learn about their culture, the way they go about doing things- the similarities, the differences. Denmark is a very homogenous society. They are often regarded as one of the happiest countries in the world. I wouldn’t use the word happy (especially the American feeling of happiness) to describe the Danes, I would use content. They do not want to “keep up with the Joneses,” rather the opposite of that actually. They are encouraged to be average. Jante’s Law being very evident. They also look at friendship differently. Danes look at friendship as a life long relationship, with most of their friends being made when they were in school. They are not going to invest in someone who likely won’t be here long term. That’s not to say that you can’t connect with a Dane, but all of the friends I’ve made here are expats. Danes aren’t what I would call outwardly friendly either. They do not chat with strangers. They are approachable and nice to you if you ask for assistance, but will not go out of their way to see if you need help. The Danish tend more towards respecting your privacy and staying out of your business. I’m sure I make a good number of them uncomfortable with my big smiles, eye contact, and hellos, but my Southerness cannot be stopped, even in Scandinavia.

We are lucky that in Copenhagen the majority of people speak English. Not only do they speak it, they don’t mind speaking it. Although they can speak English, they are Danish and largely (and obviously) speak in Danish. (Swedes, Norwegians, and Danes usually speak to each other in English, as they find it hard to understand each other.) So, conversations all around you, on the bus, at the stores, at restaurants are in a language you don’t understand. It’s like white noise. It can be very isolating as well. I found listening to music, podcasts, the Atlanta sports radio app really helpful. Also, the majority of the music you hear in restaurants, stores, bars, etc. is in English, which is nice. The Danes like all kinds of American music- oldies, metal, rap, rock. Fun fact- The first song I heard when we got here was Britney Spear’s “Hit me Baby one More Time.”

Danish is a hard language. The kids are learning it in school and their pronunciation is better then mine. As an American, I tend to enunciate every syllable in a word, and that is not the case here. The Danes mumble and swallow the end of words. While I can understand a lot of written Danish now, (mostly with regards to shopping, food, and transportation) to understand it spoken is still extremely hard for me.

I am horrible with directions. I always have been, as my friends and husband can attest to. We don’t have a car here- we walk, bike, use the bus, and the train. As such, I have become quite adept at navigating my surrounding areas. I can actually give directions to the many tourists in our neighborhood now. (We live close to the Little Mermaid statue.) Not having a car was a big lifestyle change for us. There are times when it’s been really hard without one and the kids have whined about it, but you learn to deal. The Danish public transportation is vast, and I have enjoyed not having to worry about driving. Everything is very walkable and reachable for us because we are so central. We love our apartment and where it is located.

One of the downsides of living in a different country. It’s the little things that can frustrate you. Things like all the different European sizes, the crazy return policies you thought would be at least thirty days but aren’t, not being able to find the correct floor cleaner that you are told you have to use, figuring out how to fix the range hood when it stops working and the instructions are all in Danish, trying to watch college football, figuring out which websites actually deliver to Denmark (they don’t have a Danish Amazon), wondering where you can buy all purpose flour (hint- you can’t, it doesn’t exist here) and so many more. Things that didn’t even cross your mind would be a problem. All the silly little stuff that is so clear and easy to overcome back home makes you feel so helpless and stupid here. Thankfully, it does get better as time goes on (or maybe my coping skills have improved.) Your knowledge of how things work here grows, you learn to accept that what you are looking for just doesn’t exist here, and you find friends that have been here long enough to answer all your questions. I still come across things that make me crazy though. Recently, I almost drove myself crazy trying to find the right ingredients to make slime. After multiple attempts, it turns out the glue and contact solution here don’t have the correct chemicals, and they don’t sell borax. It’s always something…

Overall, living in Denmark has been amazing. We have grown and experienced so much individually and as a family. If the first year is any indication, the next two years will be quite the ride.

xoxo-sk